I could do anything…corrected

Per an earlier post, I am putting all creative projects on hold right now. The tool I am using for this comes from a famous book by Barbara Sher called “Refuse to Choose.” She postulates a common behavior called ’scanning’ whereby people pick up a career or hobby, pursue it for a little while, then move on to something else. I found to my immense relief and greater understanding of my life, that I am what she calls a ‘Serial Master Scanner’.  To make  a long post short- she talks about a ’scanner finish’ to undone projects, this involves boxing them up and for me, evaluating them in terms of what I have learned, the timeframe and resources needed to complete, etc.  In my case, my creative projects have been superseded by the larger goal I spoke of earlier, but when I look at it, the larger goal of recovering my time also supports the creative work by creating all the time they need to complete, even if that time is a ways off in the future. But what better way to value and support creative work then to arrange circumstances to be able to pursue it full-time? This was the real goal of each creative pursuit by itself to begin with. To write, sing, or compose full-time? That is unquestionably success.

Digging in my heels

So my new adventure in social work is working out pretty well so far. I have had several moments where things just click, and I am starting to feel that I am in the right spot. I feel confident in my abilities to make this work. In the past I have run from challenges, and the last time I did anything remotely challenging for work, it was 2001. It’s time for me to dig in and push through, go outside my comfort zone and build something new as far as my skills go. I am ready to face the test, I don’t need things to be easy on the 9-5 anymore. All my creative stuff has been set aside in order to deal with financials and an actual, real career. It’s good to be focused and I may have at least set aside my slacker ways for a few years anyway. It is something that is worth all of my energy and effort, I feel as if I am confronting the shadow part of human nature directly, unflinchingly and with the intent to engage and create change.  It may be exactly what I have been looking for.